Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Ten on Tuesday

1.  Let's talk about Sunday morning church.  Is it hard for you to worship surrounded by your people (my word for your kids)?  I go in with high hopes. We sit on the second row.  I am way too easily distracted to sit any farther back.  (And yes, I do have a row I share with my childhood friend and her family. And yes, we will be put out if you sit on our row.  But we are nice people and if you are a visitor, we will find somewhere else to sit without giving you a dirty look.  If you are a member, you better back off our row.) When the Introit is played and Call to Worship is read, I am  ready to get my worship on.  All in. And then one of my people needs some gum.  Or a pencil.  Or a potty break (despite my excessive reminders before we walked in the sanctuary). So, I break and accommodate.  Back to worship.  It's time to stand and sing (Come Thou Fount, my favorite) and the littlest person doesn't want to sing because he is drawing.  When I remind him that it's time to stand, he begrudgingly stands and then scrapes his cheek on my wedding ring.  Whimpering ensues.  Pass him down to his dad and let the big boy sit by me.  Back to worship.  Ready for the pastoral prayer.  The big boy wants to know where we are eating.  Ignore.  It's time to send the littlest to children's church and listen to the sermon.  All in.  Did I mention that Emory and her best friend sit in front of me?  Hello distractions.  She plays with all the sticky letters on her 3 ring binder, flips through the Harry Potter book she brought to church(?!?), and for the finale, takes out her wallet and looks through every card and receipt that she has.  I can't tell you how many times I kick the back of her chair during one service.  When she broke out the wallet I gave her some actual words. Listening intently to the sermon and the one next to me leans over and asks how much longer.  Ignore.  (I won't even mention that Jason started passing notes to me at this point.)  Thank goodness for that closing hymn. (I want to print the entire song but this is going to be long enough.)
Father, Long Before Creation
God's compassion is my story, Is my boasting all the day;
Mercy free and never failing, Moves my will, directs my way,
God so loved us, God so loved us, That His only Son He gave.
And the world will song His love, Yes the world will sing his love, 
And we'll all join hands, every woman, every man,
To sing His love, To sing His love.
Emory and her friend were dancing as they sang and I really wanted to throw my hands in the air and shout "Hallelujah!".  It was another good day in the House of the Lord.  
2. Then we went out to eat. It was Jason's idea and I reminded him of that numerous times.  We had 3 adults and 5 kids.  We went to a throw your peanuts on the ground steak place.  It took forever.  Jason's grumpiness is in equal proportion to his hungriness, and he was hungry.  My friend and I took the prime seats at the table that was pushed up to the end of the booth.  We felt like we were having our own private lunch while Jason dealt with the kids.  And our waiter just kept bringing buttery yeast rolls with cinnamon, honey butter.  Two hours later we were stuffed and the kids had been assigned work detail in our backyard.  (His idea.)
3.  I am not embarrassed at all that I have more than one song on my iPod by Chiddy Bang. I just hate saying that name.  
4.  My kids got out of the habit of watching TV while we were in Tybee.  My goal was to keep them out of the habit.  My solution was to unplug the cable wire in the playroom. My people have not attempted to plug it back in.  Maybe it's because the TV in the playroom weighs 500 pounds and they know they better not try to move it.  Whatever the reason, it's nice.  They can play the wii, but not watch hours of dramatic teen shows or insipid cartoons. Such a simple solution.  
5.  I have a friend who is an amazing baker. (One night last week I was really just done.  Kids, bills, and so on.  She texted me a picture of the three different types of cupcakes [raspberry, chocolate, and blue cream cheese icing] she had just made and said come get some. I did.  And that was my supper.  Plus a Diet Coke and some pretzels.  And some girl time.)   She told me about this baking blog that has now become a favorite of mine.  This girls has ridiculous recipes but her blogging is hilarious.  She has a way with words. These are some of my favorites and I really want you to check these out.  I promise you will be eating something delicious and rolling on the floor laughing.
6.  My apologies to you if you wear sunglasses inside, but this makes me laugh.
7.  I'm just going to have to say that I was happy to hear that Britney Spears' judge ruled that she must stay under her conservatorship.  I love Britney.  I am so proud of how far she has come, but I do think that it's best for someone else to make all of her decisions for her. All of them.  In other Britney news, I am super excited to see her on the X Factor (which I have never watched before, but will now) and at the same time I am so nervous for her.  I don't know if live television is the best place for her.  I think I might start biting my nails when she comes on. (I'm even more super excited that I will be in NYC and get to watch with Betsy.  She also loves Britney.)  
8.  Where did this baby go?
9.  My car leaks.  That's right.  Somehow a seal was broken and now it leaks on the passenger side, under the dash.  That is in addition to someone keying it.  That someone was Emory, and I know because she wrote her name.  It was a little muddy and she got a rock to write in the mud.  Nice. Wet car equals stinky car so I bought a fabulous air freshener at Bath and Body Works.  Just remember, I am not defined by the car I drive.  I drive a wonky car, but I am not a wonky person.  At least most of the time.  
10.  I don't usually like Christian pop songs.  I just don't.  I do like this song.  And I love the lyrics (from 1 Corinthians 13:1-3)
If I sing but don't have love

I waste my breathe with every song
I bring, an empty voice
A hollow noise

If I speak with a silver tongue
Convince a crowd but don't have love
I leave a bitter taste
With every word I say

So let my life be the proof
The proof of Your love
Let my love look like You
And what You're made of
How you lived, how You died
Love is sacrifice
So let my life be the proof
The proof of Your love

If I give to a needy soul
But don't have love then who is poor
It seems all the poverty
Is found in me
11.  Amen!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I'm laughing my head off. Girl, you could do standup Pâté!