Ten on Tuesday

1.  Let's talk about Sunday morning church.  Is it hard for you to worship surrounded by your people (my word for your kids)?  I go in with high hopes. We sit on the second row.  I am way too easily distracted to sit any farther back.  (And yes, I do have a row I share with my childhood friend and her family. And yes, we will be put out if you sit on our row.  But we are nice people and if you are a visitor, we will find somewhere else to sit without giving you a dirty look.  If you are a member, you better back off our row.) When the Introit is played and Call to Worship is read, I am  ready to get my worship on.  All in. And then one of my people needs some gum.  Or a pencil.  Or a potty break (despite my excessive reminders before we walked in the sanctuary). So, I break and accommodate.  Back to worship.  It's time to stand and sing (Come Thou Fount, my favorite) and the littlest person doesn't want to sing because he is drawing.  When I remind him that it's time to stand, he begrudgingly stands and then scrapes his cheek on my wedding ring.  Whimpering ensues.  Pass him down to his dad and let the big boy sit by me.  Back to worship.  Ready for the pastoral prayer.  The big boy wants to know where we are eating.  Ignore.  It's time to send the littlest to children's church and listen to the sermon.  All in.  Did I mention that Emory and her best friend sit in front of me?  Hello distractions.  She plays with all the sticky letters on her 3 ring binder, flips through the Harry Potter book she brought to church(?!?), and for the finale, takes out her wallet and looks through every card and receipt that she has.  I can't tell you how many times I kick the back of her chair during one service.  When she broke out the wallet I gave her some actual words. Listening intently to the sermon and the one next to me leans over and asks how much longer.  Ignore.  (I won't even mention that Jason started passing notes to me at this point.)  Thank goodness for that closing hymn. (I want to print the entire song but this is going to be long enough.)

Father, Long Before Creation

God's compassion is my story, Is my boasting all the day;

Mercy free and never failing, Moves my will, directs my way,

God so loved us, God so loved us, That His only Son He gave.

Chorus:

And the world will song His love, Yes the world will sing his love, 

And we'll all join hands, every woman, every man,

To sing His love, To sing His love.

Emory and her friend were dancing as they sang and I really wanted to throw my hands in the air and shout "Hallelujah!".  It was another good day in the House of the Lord.  

2. Then we went out to eat. It was Jason's idea and I reminded him of that numerous times.  We had 3 adults and 5 kids.  We went to a throw your peanuts on the ground steak place.  It took forever.  Jason's grumpiness is in equal proportion to his hungriness, and he was hungry.  My friend and I took the prime seats at the table that was pushed up to the end of the booth.  We felt like we were having our own private lunch while Jason dealt with the kids.  And our waiter just kept bringing buttery yeast rolls with cinnamon, honey butter.  Two hours later we were stuffed and the kids had been assigned work detail in our backyard.  (His idea.)

3.  I am not embarrassed at all that I have more than one song on my iPod by Chiddy Bang. I just hate saying that name.  

4.  My kids got out of the habit of watching TV while we were in Tybee.  My goal was to keep them out of the habit.  My solution was to unplug the cable wire in the playroom. My people have not attempted to plug it back in.  Maybe it's because the TV in the playroom weighs 500 pounds and they know they better not try to move it.  Whatever the reason, it's nice.  They can play the wii, but not watch hours of dramatic teen shows or insipid cartoons. Such a simple solution.  

5.  I have a friend who is an amazing baker. (One night last week I was really just done.  Kids, bills, and so on.  She texted me a picture of the three different types of cupcakes [raspberry, chocolate, and blue cream cheese icing] she had just made and said come get some. I did.  And that was my supper.  Plus a Diet Coke and some pretzels.  And some girl time.)   She told me about this baking blog that has now become a favorite of mine.  This girls has ridiculous recipes but her blogging is hilarious.  She has a way with words. These are some of my favorites and I really want you to check these out.  I promise you will be eating something delicious and rolling on the floor laughing.

Gooey Cinnamon Muffins

Cookie Crazy Cupcakes

White Chocolate Brownies

6.  My apologies to you if you wear sunglasses inside, but this makes me laugh.

7.  I'm just going to have to say that I was happy to hear that Britney Spears' judge ruled that she must stay under her conservatorship.  I love Britney.  I am so proud of how far she has come, but I do think that it's best for someone else to make all of her decisions for her. All of them.  In other Britney news, I am super excited to see her on the X Factor (which I have never watched before, but will now) and at the same time I am so nervous for her.  I don't know if live television is the best place for her.  I think I might start biting my nails when she comes on. (I'm even more super excited that I will be in NYC and get to watch with Betsy.  She also loves Britney.)  

8.  Where did this baby go?

9.  My car leaks.  That's right.  Somehow a seal was broken and now it leaks on the passenger side, under the dash.  That is in addition to someone keying it.  That someone was Emory, and I know because she wrote her name.  It was a little muddy and she got a rock to write in the mud.  Nice. Wet car equals stinky car so I bought a fabulous air freshener at Bath and Body Works.  Just remember, I am not defined by the car I drive.  I drive a wonky car, but I am not a wonky person.  At least most of the time.  

10.  I don't usually like Christian pop songs.  I just don't.  I do like this song.  And I love the lyrics (from 1 Corinthians 13:1-3)

                           

If I sing but don't have love

I waste my breathe with every song

I bring, an empty voice

A hollow noise

If I speak with a silver tongue

Convince a crowd but don't have love

I leave a bitter taste

With every word I say

(Chorus)

So let my life be the proof

The proof of Your love

Let my love look like You

And what You're made of

How you lived, how You died

Love is sacrifice

So let my life be the proof

The proof of Your love

If I give to a needy soul

But don't have love then who is poor

It seems all the poverty

Is found in me

11.  Amen!

Ten on Tuesday

Do you hear that?  It's quiet at my house.  Ahhhh.  At least until 12:30 when my kindergartener comes home.  I love that our school does a half day for kindergarten.  More time with my Pac and I don't care what you think.  He's my baby.
1.  A new school year totally trumps a new calendar year at my house.  I totally operate on a school calendar, so for me, last Tuesday was New Year's Eve.  I love the feeling of everyone getting back into routines.  Summer is great but when it's time to go back, we I am ready.  Alarm clocks are set, new supplies bought, and visions of how I am going to stay on top of things are dancing in my head.  Just like all good resolutions, mine are sure to be broken quickly.
2.  One of my goals for this year was to continue (Betsy did this with the kids at Tybee) to read The Gospel Story Bible for a morning devotion. I did it one morning, got frustrated that no one was listening, slammed the book down and told my kids "I give up on y'all."  That is so gospel of me isn't it?  The gospel, where Jesus takes all of my sin on himself, and dies a death I deserve so that I can have eternal life.  But I tell my kids I'm giving up on them. Ouch. I did go back and apologize to them.  I did tell them that I would never give up on them.  But I also told them that God never gives up on his children and how thankful I am for that.  Even when we think we want Him to give up on us He won't.  (And for those of you who understand how it feels to actually want God to turn you loose and then have Him redeem the mess that you have made of yourself, are you with me in praising His holy name? Every single day.)
3.  I can sometimes be overwhelmed at the start of the new school year.  This article really inspired me to make good decisions for me and my family.  That doesn't just mean cutting out the junk and the time wasters.  This means really thinking about where I am putting my energy.  If I have a goal to help other addicts, but I'm so busy that I'm not going to 12 step meetings or have any time to spend talking with people, then something has to go.  I think this sometimes is hard when it comes to church.  If I am active in my Sunday School, participating in a small group, attending Bible study on Wednesday night, in addition to Sunday worship and my quiet time in the morning, then I probably don't need to join another study just because they are offering one.  Now that is just what is best for me.  Everyone has to decide where God is calling them to serve and be used.
I'm Done Living a WalMart Life.
4.  Speaking of the junk, I was a 90210 junkie in high school. I loved it had a serious crush on Dylan McKay.  (Both Jay and Emory have scars on their eyebrows and I call them their Dylan McKay scars.)

All that to say, I love these new Old Navy commercials.  They make me smile.  Especially Andrea Zuckerman.  (And Dylan.) (Don't you think Jason looked a little like Jason Priestley when we first started dating?)

5.  So we are still reading Harry Potter.  (YES!)  We finished the first two books and watched the first two movies.  I could have hired a marching band to parade up and down my driveway when Jay, my non-reader, said, "Mom, I liked the movie but the book was better."  (YES!)  The book is always better. And just to put a cherry on top, Jay is reading....because he wants to.  It makes my heart smile when I see him bring his book with him to the table to eat lunch.
6.  So You Think You Can Dance has really bummed me out this year.  They have been only given one night a week (instead of two like previous years) and the new format stinks.  Betsy is in Connecticut with no TV and although Jason was watching with me I had a frustration that I needed to share.  Enter social media.  I have 10 tweets under my handle.  There are 4 retweets, 2 tweets that Packy (?) sent, and 4 that I actually sent.  Three are about SYTYCD.  I needed to connect with other people who were frustrated and Twitter did that for me. I embrace that we live in an instant society and sometimes I like it. (That might not mean anything to you.  Especially you  Dad.)
7.  Packy and his bestest friend are in class together this year and it makes me so happy.  Packy loves kindergarten and has the biggest smile on his face when I pick him up.  He has an amazing teacher who also taught Jay kindergarten (at a different school).  She reminded me that Packy was born when Jay was in her class.  So happy to have our sweet school and sweet friends.

8.  Since I haven't posted in a while, I didn't really get to talk about my re-entry from Tybee.  It's always a little hard.  Hard for me because I have to get used to seeing all of the things at my house that need my attention.  I handled this by taking the kids to the pool as often as I could, with a good book.  It's hard for Jason because he has the house on lockdown in July.  No lights on, doors shut, everything put away.  When we come home it takes him a while to adjust to what actual people living in his house looks like.  And it looks messy.  (One of those new school resolutions is to have the house picked up before Jason gets home.)  It's also hard to back into the gym routine.  It actually hurts because I have basically given up trying to exercise at the beach (except for some spotty running).  I like to milk my "re-entry" and by the end of the second week, Betsy was over it.  She informed me that I had been home 2 weeks and was "entered" and it was time move on.  So, I did.
9.  A lot can happen in one month.  I didn't go to any 12 step meetings so I was really ready when I came home to get back into some good habits.  (I usually do go and I should have gone this year.)  When I got back I found out that a couple of people I knew had relapsed.  People who had years of sobriety.  It was a huge wake up call.  I had gotten to place where I had taken my sobriety for granted because I don't crave using anymore. This is scary for an addict.  If I am relying on myself and have an attitude of "I've got this!" then I am not in recovery.  I might still be sober, but I am not in recovery.  This attitude also leads to pride and looking down on others who are still struggling to get sober.  I have to remind myself that if I start using and drinking again, I could end up just as bad off as the person I am looking down on.  Just because I have a nice clean house and kids dressed in private school uniforms doesn't protect me from complete self-destruction.  Working with people who are trying to get sober can be frustrating and sad, as well as extremely fufilling, but it always reminds me that staying sober is alot easier than getting sober.
10.  Since I posted Jason's 90210 picture, I should tell you that we celebrated our 20th high-school reunion the night after I got back from Tybee.  It was so fun to see so many of the people that we graduated with.  I would say for the most part that people are happier 20 years after high school than they were when they were in it.  I know I am.  I wouldn't go back to high school for anything.  Some of my insecutities crept back in a little, and I realized I am better in a small group than in a big crowd.  Enter the smoking section.  No wonder I like the smoking section. It's a smaller crowd where I can actually hear what people are saying (versus inside the party where the music is pumping).  I tried to get Jason to agree that we should smoke for high school times sake.  He said no.  Always the voice of reason, that Jason.  So, we just hung out with our friends who are still smoking and enjoyed some second hand smoke. (We have been nicotine free for 3 years.) (I still miss smoking.)  (Yes, I know it's gross.)

11.  My editor did not like me ending on a smoking note so I am trying to think of something else to tell you...about her.  She is getting really good at dealing with mice and snakes.  And she has the most precious girls.  Overall, my Tybee pictures this year stink, but I do love this one of some morning sister love.

Ten on Tuesday

1.  These are the Tweedles.  As in Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum, but don't tell them that.  They are so fun and so funny.  They love each other big, play big, and fight big.  They aren't part of the "big" kids team and they aren't babies, they are just Tweedles.  They answer to this name without question. (They also like to call each other butt face when they are fighting. I told you they can fight big.)
2.  Just in case you are new to my blog, I will tell you where I have been for the last month.  My mom has a house on Tybee Island and for the last few years my sister and I have spent the month of July there.  With my mom, my 3 kids, and my sister's 3 kids.  (The husbands come the first week and then some weekends.)  It's a 3 bedroom house so it's close quarters.  It goes by super fast and super slow, depending on the day.
3.  I love to read in the summer.  Love the hours I can spend reading and not feel guilty about it.  I've read a few books already and I'm currently reading Steve Job's biography.  But one of my favorite things about this July has been reading Harry Potter to my kids before bed. I am a huge Harry Potter fan. HUGE.  I told the kids I was going to read it and all I got were groans.  "We don't want to read that. Mom. Ughhh."   This conversation turned ugly as I told them (in a stern but guilt inducing voice) that I love this book and have waited for the day when I could share it with them. Could they please just do it for me?  And that they didn't have to believe me, but could millions of kids be wrong?  Then I brought out the big guns and declared that no one would be going to Universal Studios in Orlando or watch any of the movies unless they sat quietly and listened while I read.  That threat got me through the first night and by the second night they were hooked and by the third night they were asking me to read extra chapters.  Mmmm  hmmm.  Told y'all it was good.  (This really has given me such profound happiness.  Not exaggerating.)
4.  The first weekend we were in Tybee I got a text saying that my next door neighbor had a stroke and was in a coma.  A couple of days later he died at age 51 leaving behind a wife and 18 year old son.  My kids have all of their grandparent and 3 great-grandparents.  Death is something they have never been close to.  Telling them Mr. Mike was gone was really hard.  Emory cried and Jay just put his head down.  Packy asked a few questions.    Mike was a great guy.  Always funny.  We mostly talked driveway to driveway but he was still in my day to day life.  He shot bats at dusk in his backyard, but was always kind enough to send me a text that he was about to do it.  It hit me again when I came home Friday.  Tears flowed as I realized again that he would not be there to greet me in the driveway.
5.  A month is a long time to be away.  I usually have a freak out moment at some point during the trip.  This year my freak out moment came via Emory.  We struggled with some back talking this summer and one night I just had enough.  I will spare you the details, but it was not my finest parenting moment.  The next day, I stayed home while Lolly napped and everyone else went to the beach.  I needed alone time.  I think this is the hardest part about our July, no alone time.  I prayed, wrote (about 4 blog posts that I never posted), and rested.  I made amends with Emory and moved on.
6.  I love Hattie's sweet smile.

 7.  This year we had lots of activities.  We had an awesome time with our new kayaks, the boys went deep sea fishing and I tagged along (never again), lots of bike rides to the beach, really good waves to ride on our Boogie Boards, riding bikes at Fort Polaski, a pirate adventure on the Savannah River, lots of gelato from Seaside Sweets.  The big girls went to YMCA camp for a week. We really didn't watch TV at all which is a nice break for my family.  We played less UNO but more Rat-A-Tat-Cat.  Betsy led morning devotions with the The Gospel Story Bible.  But despite all of our planning, the best part for the cousins is the free playing.  The big girls play pretend for hours.  They go on the upstairs porch and let their imaginations run wild.  The Tweedles also can play for hours (with a fight thrown it at some point). They play Mommy and Daddy mostly.  This leaves lots of reading and napping time for the adults.  (You can usually find some adult on the porch after lunch with their mouth wide open in the napping position.)

8.  Every year Betsy and I seem to leave Tybee with some regrets.  We didn't do this or that.  We should have done this more. Why didn't we do this?  Although I did feel this way driving off the island, I really think we did good this year.  We didn't have crazy expectations and I think that takes the pressure off of all of us. The kids will remember being together every summer and not all the things we didn't do.
9.  For the second year Jason's brother has come to Tybee during July bringing his two children.  This has been fun because he stays in a hotel and gives us pool access for a week.  Mirabelle joins the Tweedles and Haden gives Jay a boy to play with for a few days. It's so fun to merge cousins!

10.  I have already booked my flight for a September trip to New York. So, even though I was sad to see my girls leave, I know I don't have to wait until Christmas to see them again!

Ten on Tuesday

1.  I went to a women's conference in Orlando last weekend.  It was a conference for women but not about  women, which was really nice.  I really don't need more advice on parenting or how to be a good wife.  I've read all the books.  What I needed was to be reminded how big my God is and how much He loves me.  And that He wants me to love other people.  And that he has given me everything I need in order to do that.

Resentment of what we don't have is the number one reason we don't use what we do have. (Paige Benton Brown)

(Google her and listen to any of her talks.  She is an amazing speaker.  Amazing.)

2.  I have been really excited about the Olympics this summer.  These athletes are so amazing and it's nice to have something I can watch with my children without worry of inappropriate content.  It also allows conversations about practice, dedication, hard work, and not giving up to take place organically.  My people tend to quit when it gets hard so I welcome these conversations and these Olympic role models. But it's the commercials from Proctor and Gamble really get me. Maybe you DVR and fast forward through commercials so I'm going to let you watch it.  (There are a few versions.  This one puts them all together.)

The hardest job in the world,

is the best job in the world.

(My goal is to see if I can get you to cry each week.  Are you crying or am I just a big 'ole crybaby?)
3.  Jay is at surf camp this week with Mimi.  Last year he did kayaking camp.  He brings his good friend and they have some quality Tybee time with Mimi.  She said they both got up on the boards today and they are already looking around for a used board to buy.  Mimi and Jay have a sweet relationship.  He is her oldest grandchild and she never had a boy.  I really like that she they get to have one on one time before the chaos of summer ensues.  (Part of the chaos is driving down from NYC as I type.  Can't wait.)
4.  Emory, Packy and I went to see Brave.  It was a really good movie.  The mother/daughter relationship was one of the central themes and it had a really good message.  I didn't cry until the movie was over, but I did cry.  When I first took Emory's picture I was prepared to write about how I was struggling with her.  Fast forward two weeks of not blogging and I am in a different place with her.  I am listening to her and not responding with anger when she loses it.  Talking to her in a calm voice when she is frustrated really works better than my previous method of screaming along side her.  (Still trying to break that screaming cycle in my family.)  She is growing up so fast.

5.  I am in planning overload.  Tybee 2012 is a few days away and I really want this year to be special.  (Every year is special but it helps to plan.)  Jay is now old enough to do some big boy stuff, so deep sea fishing is on the docket.  New board games, kayaks, books, crafts have all been bought.  My head is kind of spinning. Is it really a few days away???

6.

7.  I can never buy enough pens, notepads, books, and fingernail polish.  Ever.  

8.  I drove to Orlando with one of my friends and we met Betsy and one of her friends, who flew in.  The plan was to go to the conference and spend as much free time as we could by the amazing pool at the Orlando Hilton.  Amazing pool complete with lazy river.  Well, Tropical Storm Debbie put an end to all that.  No sun.  Just rain.  Hard rain.  We still had a great time being together.  And we only hit one parked car, could not get out of a four story parking garage after endlessly circling for about 15 minutes, and took a wrong turn on the way home and didn't know it until we got to Daytona.  Can't wait until the next trip Ava, Heather, and Betsy.

9. You know you have a good friend when she hands you a tiny tupperware filled with her most delicious cream cheese icing because she knows you like to dip pretzels in it. Yum.

10.  Summer is here and that means... SO YOU CAN THINK YOU CAN DANCE!  I have to admit that tears filled my eyes when Cat Deely said those words.  Sad, I know.
Favorite new dance in the kitchen song: Heart Skips a Beat by Olly Murs (You can catch him opening for One Direction, who I always like to call New Direction.  Yes, I relate well to 15 year olds.)
Favorite new mascara: They're Real! by Benefit

Ten on Tuesday

How can this baby be going into kindegarten?

1.  On the day we left Tybee, Jason took the kids in his truck so I could stay behind and finish cleaning up.  I left about an hour behind him.  I pulled into the gas station we always go to on our way out of Tybee and realized I didn't have my wallet.  No clue where it was. I had about a quarter of a tank of gas left.  Not enough to get home.  After finding my wallet in his truck,  Jason had some decisions to make.  Was he going to sit where he was and wait for me to catch up with him or come up with Plan B?  He went with Plan B.   Go to the next exit with gas (Metter, everything's better in Metter), find a "trustworthy" gas attendant, and leave some money with instructions to give it to me an hour later. (He tried to pre-pay with a card, but she wouldn't let him do that.) So when I arrived at the gas station an hour later the nice lady handed me $35 with my name on it.  I spent $32 on gas and a couple on gummy bears.  Who would have thought this plan would work?

2.  See the flag above Packy's bed?  My mom made it.  Eat your heart out Pottery Barn.  She found some old fencing at an antique sale and painted it.  Packy is very patriotic and loves the American flag.   This is one of my favorite decorations in my house.  I still have lots of bare walls because I am sticking to my guns about not hanging something just to fill space.  I have to love it.  This, I love.  Thanks to my very talented mom. 

3.  I am currently doing the Love Like Him study with the Do Not Depart girls.  It has been very helpful because loving does not always come easy or natural to me.  These follow up blogs really helped me examine how I love.
                 Love Like Him 1 Corinthians 13:1-3. It's not just how you show love but your motives too.  (Motives!  I say it the way Seinfield says Newman!.  Just when I think I've got it all under control I remember that my motives matter. Motives!)
                Because I love you.- I love how she personalized 1 Corinthians 13. 
4. And then I watched this. (Get the Kleenex ready. For real.)

I was in Sunday School last week with someone who said she was sure that we were at the end of times because everything is awful in the world. Nothing is getting better, only worse.  I totally disagree. I think God shows us every day ways that He is redeeming His people. He uses situations where we see no hope and then brings glory to His name.  How can you watch this and not think that God is still active in this world?
5.  Community.  I used to think of this as just the latest Christian buzz word.  Live in community.  I don't anymore.  I live community.
The Christian life is not a self-project. We are a people of God and cannot live the Christian life by ourselves. We live in community whether we want to or not, whether we admit to it or not. The Bible knows nothing of the solitary Christian. Having been created and saved we are now commanded to live out our creation and salvation in the community that Christ gathers by his Holy Spirit. Deuteronomy and Luke/Acts are major texts that ground us in this world, this community, in which Christ plays."
~Eugene Peterson

I have seen my community change alot over the past few years. I have my family community (immediate and extended), my church community, my gym community, my school community, and my community of believing girlfriends mixed in these groups and all around.  God did not design us to live alone.  He designed us to live together.  Bearing one another's burdens, holding each other up, rejoicing together, and sharing in our "like broken-ness".  This doesn't mean I have someone in my home every single night, but it does mean I am in close connection with people.  I want to know how people are doing; with their marriage, with their kids, with their walk with the Lord.  I pray for people.  I make myself available to people who are broken in the same ways I am, and share how the Lord has used these struggles to draw me so much closer to him.  I laugh with these people and cry with them.  I love their children.  I hurt when they hurt.  It's hard to feel all alone when you are living in community with other believers.  

6.  I went to the movies yesterday (alone) and saw The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. 

It was a sweet movie and I saw it with every woman over 70 in Macon.  

"Everything will be all right in the end. If it's not all right, then it's not the end." (Sonny)

I wanted an inspiring movie and since I journaled this morning and blogged this afternoon, I think it worked.  It is sort of Eat, Pray, Love meets Slumdog Millionaire.  

7.  Betsy has a hilarious friend named Kelsey that she once lived with in the city.  This friend now lives in LA and has a blog that has made me laugh out loud more than once.  Do yourself a favor and read her blog, Does My Minivan Make Me Look Fat?, when you have some time.  So funny.
8.  My plan for the summer is to have no expectations.  No lofty goals.  No extreme kid makeover projects.  Just have fun.  And sometimes have no fun. Sorry.  We will get our book reports finished before the first day of school and work on our multiplication, but other than that, I am playing it by ear.   I have tried to operate with a daily schedule in past summers.  That can work until I want to throw myself out the window.  Too much pressure.  We have been out of school for 1 and a half weeks.  So far, so good.  We have been to a pool almost every day.  It's my best chance of survival.  It's hot in Macon.  Really hot.  Now that Pac can swim, I can actually read a book part of the time.  It makes my people really tired and they seem to get along better in water.  Win, win.
9.  I am already sick of hearing Mama. Mama, Mama, Mama. Just don't say my name for about 10 minutes.  Just talk to me without saying Mama first.  (Packy said it twice while I typed that sentence.  For real).  It's worse than nails on a chalkboard.  (Jay- 3 more times.)  This Loving Like Him is hard when you hear your name over and over again.  Normally with a request at the end.  Love is patient.  Ugh.
10.  By the time your read this I will  be at Wild Adventures (or probably at home because you have totally given up all hope that I would actually do this on Tuesday).  Jason's mom and dad are taking our family and his brother's family for a summer adventure.  They kids have literally been counting down the days.

Trying to Catch Up

Let's catch up.
 In the last 3 weeks I have: celebrated my oldest son's 11th birthday (and my Dad's 60 something), been to two end-of-the-year bowling parties, hosted a wedding shower, attended a wedding (with all of my kids), sent Jay on his first overnight school trip, had Emory's ears pierced, had 8 trees cut down at my house, attended the elementary school awards ceremony (Jay made all A's), attended the 4k end-of-the-year program, baked brownies and cookies for teachers, baked brownies for a pool party, bought the teacher gift for the class I am the room mom for, took the boys to LEGOLAND in Atlanta, took the kids to a pool party on last day of school.  Then summer started.

This is my LEGOLAND story.

•    I love surprises.  I love being a part of a surprise even more.  A week ago I took the kids to school as usual but as soon as we got in the actual carpool line I suddenly remembered that Jay had a "dentist appointment" and told him not to get out of the car when Emory did.  Then I told Packy the same thing.  When Emory, who was in on the surprise, got out, I looked at Jay (and Packy) and said, "The real reason we aren't going to school is that we are skipping with some other boys and going to LEGOLAND in Atlanta."  The picture below was his reaction.  "Really? Are you serious?" We had so much fun.  I don't really want to promote skipping school but it was such a fun surprise and a great memory.

After the pool party on the last day of school we went to Tybee for Memorial Day weekend with friends.  Aside from having to take Bogey to the vet because he was chewing his tail off, we had so much fun.  I don't like to think (which is why Crossfit works so well for me).  So when you have a motivated person that says we are packing up the bikes and going to ride trails at Fort Pulaski, I just say OK.  No thinking involved.  Such a fun, easy trip, despite having 7 kids around.

Ten on Tuesday

1.  Guess where I was last week?  Betsy and Lee took an anniversary (10 years) trip and so mom and I came to babysit the girls. It took both of us to do the job of one Betsy, but I must say we make a good team.  And the time I got to spend with the baby without her mom around was priceless.  My baby "love tank" is full.  (And a big thanks to my mother in law and my dad who babysat my children while Jason worked and played in a 3 day golf tournament.  Thank you Ceci and Papa!!!)
2.  I get very anxious before I travel.  I'm not scared to fly but I just feel weird when I leave my family.  My preparation to leave seems to include doing laundry until I'm sure there is not a sock left and going to the grocery store and stocking up on an insane about of snacks.  Not sure if this is guilt induced but for some reason I think if they have enough snacks it will make it easier that I'm gone.
3.  Emory put a picture of herself in my suitcase and took a picture of me to school with her each day.  She wept when I was walking out the door. She has been upset the last couple of times I have left, even if it's for a night.  My fear was realized when Jason called and told me she was upset because it reminded her of when I left to go to "Mommy School" (rehab).  She had just turned 6 when I went so she does remember.  I just give her extra love and assure her that I am coming back.  Then I make sure I am "on the beam" with my program.  Am I thanking God for each sober day he gives me?  Am I talking about things I need to talk about and not holding things in?  Am I growing in my relationship with God and trying to be of service to Him?  Every day.  Her tears and fears are a good reminder to me of how much my sobriety is worth.
4.  I really didn't take too many pictures.  I was busy!  Jason asked me what I did Thursday when he called and I said, "Walked Hattie to school, went to the Post Office, took Josie to school, picked Josie up from school, went to the grocery store, picked Hattie up from school, did homework, ate dinner (Mom was on cooking duty), bathed everyone, read books and put them to bed."  And he said, "So basically everything you do here, but in New York."  Exactly.  I did get to spend time with some friends and I am happy to call them my friends, not just Betsy's.  (New York gets the idea behind community.  I will give them that. I think that we sometimes use our cars as a shield from other people.  If you are walking where you are going, you have no shield from people.  Love being a part of that community if only for a few days.)

5.  I read a book the day I left for NYC.  The whole book.  I started it when I got on the van to go to the Atlanta airport and finished before I went to bed.  It was called Burnt Mountain by Anne Rivers Siddons.  I loved it until the end (strange ending) but what I loved more was reading.  What mom has the time to read a book in one day? (Insert Fifty Shades of Grey jokes here. And no I haven't read them and don't plan to.  Did you see the Amazon.com commercial on SNL?) That really is my favorite part about flying.  Sometimes the flight goes by too fast and I don't want to land.  

6.  Every time I visit New York I fall a little more in love with this city.  Without Betsy there to lead me around, I had to do it all by myself and I did.  I texted her about a thousand times but I lived the life for a few days.  I just can't really describe it.  In my day to day life I just don't see what I see on an ordinary day there.  Dog walkers, baby walkers, old people walkers.  Celebrities and crazy people in the same block.  I am still trying to stare into people's windows at night, although I am sure this is against New York city code (or maybe the law?).  I want to ask every Nanny (or Manny) what the people they work for do for a living.  I want to ask the doormen, who work the buildings around Central Park, who lives in their building that I might know.  And I still get overwhelmed with the amount of people that live in one city block.  My brain can't handle it.

7.  Sunday we went to a 25 year celebration of Hippo Park, Betsy's local playground, about a block away from her building.  It's in Riverside Park (remember the end of You've Got Mail?) and on the Hudson River.  When we got to the park this is what we saw. Hundreds and hundreds of parked strollers.  You couldn't take them into the playground area so you had to park them.  This is the tiniest shot of how many there were.  It looped around on two sides.  

8.  Let's talk about my baby.  Lolly is the sweetest.  She is walking and talking and singing.  Without her mom around, she was all mine.  I didn't really share her with Mimi (because I knew Mimi was staying an extra week).  I will say that she is feisty.  I knew she would have to be to deal with her big sister, Jo.  She is also teething which resulted in some yucky diapers.  Which resulted in me picking her up out of her high-chair at Artie's and sticking my hand straight in the poop that was so far up her back it almost touched her neck.  Not kidding.  We made an emergency trip to the bathroom and then went home as quickly as possible for a bath, both of us covered.  It's been a long time since I had poop under my fingernails.   I don't know if I could deal with that with anyone else's child, but I really didn't flinch since it was my Poppers. 

(Lolly>Lolly Pop>Pop>Poppers)

9.  One special part of this trip was spending Saturday afternoon with Hattie.  Hattie loves Emory and whenever our families are together I don't usually get to spend time with her by herself.  I snuck her out of the apartment while Josie was watching a movie and we went gallivanting around the city.  I wanted to go where there were lots of people so we jumped on the subway and went to Columbus Circle.  We went to FAO Schwartz and watched people dance on the piano (remember Big?), we watched street performers, walked by The Plaza, and shopped, of course.  (Thanks Papa.)  I loved walking and holding hands with her, not because I was scared she'd wander off but just because we wanted to hold hands. 

I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

Maya Angelou 

10.  Want to be really convicted about your phone usage?  Read this.  I am guilty.

11.  Current kitchen dancing playlist.

*Paradise/Coldplay

*Somebody That I Used to Know/Goyte

*Lotus Flower/Radiohead

*Lonely Boy/The Black Keys

*Turn You Inside Out/R.E.M.

*Feel so Close/Calvin Harris